My parents had a good divorce. My ex-husband and I had a good divorce. But, what does that mean? For years, I’ve been writing about the importance of a good divorce, and I realize it means something a little different to everyone who goes through the process. Recently, I considered the common elements of a good divorce. How can I address this topic in a more effective and efficient manner? The answer came to me a few weeks ago. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the GOOD Divorce™ Philosophy: G is for Goals. As you enter the Land of […]
Continue readingDocumentary: Divorce Corp
If you follow me on Twitter, you know that I’ve been super-excited to see the movie Divorce Corp since I found out about it a few weeks ago. Initially, I was planning a 2.5 hour road trip to see the film at the closest location. Thankfully, due to popular demand (probably thanks to Dr. Drew’s interview on CNN), it opened in a nearby theater and I was able to see the movie last night. Divorce Corp takes a painful look at the way we typically handle divorce in the US. Through interviews with lawyers, judges, custody evaluators and victims of […]
Continue readingMy 2014 Word of Intention
At the beginning of 2013, I determined that my Word of Intention for the year would be “nourish,” and I think it was appropriate. Looking back, I see that 2013 was a year of quieter reflections, close-to-home efforts and soul-supporting solitude. As a nourishing presence to others, I adopted an elderly dog (deaf, blind and arthritic, but boy is he cute!) and joined Big Brothers/Big Sisters. I also did a lot of internal processing while I nourished my mind, body and spirit. I now find myself more firmly rooted and ready to rise… …Which is I’ve chosen the word “Grow” […]
Continue readingSomeone Asked Me To Marry Them. And I Said “Yes!”
No, I’m not getting married. I’ve agreed to preside over a self-uniting ceremony for a friend and her fiance. Not a bad gig for a Divorce Encouragist, huh? I met Ellen several years ago when we were both legally married. Since then, we’ve each signed “I don’t anymore,” reclaimed our birth names, and moved on (and up) in a variety of ways. When Ellen met Andrew, circumstances were quite forbidding in terms of a serious relationship. Yet, amazingly, the stars aligned for them. After more than a year of domestic bliss, he popped the question with a ring similar to […]
Continue readingThe Right Thing is… Painful
A few weeks ago, I watched the movie, The Vicious Kind. In a closing scene, an adulterous and alienating father stops short of confessing and apologizing to his youngest son. “Sometimes people do things that they know are wrong,” he began. “But they just do them anyway. Because to do the right thing would be too painful.” His explanation grabbed me and left me contemplating the words for days. It wasn’t entirely a new concept for me. For years, I’ve been touting the phrase, “hurting people hurt people.” But… this was… different. “To do the right thing would be too […]
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