Would You Take Your Ex to the Hospital?

This week, a friend of mine took her ex-husband to the hospital. It was a move which, I thought, demonstrated a kind heart and mature relationship. Of course, not everyone thinks like me. A little background:  Penny’s ex called her one evening and asked if she could pick up their children because he was too sick to drive them to her house. She obliged, and the next day she checked in to see how he was doing. Unfortunately his condition was such that he needed immediate medical attention.  Penny drove him to the hospital, assisted him in the ER and […]

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What About the Children?

“I’m really upset about it,” a woman told me after she learned that an acquaintance of hers was getting divorced.  “I mean, I hardly even know them.  But… they have children.  It just breaks my heart.” I bit my tongue and looked away. Now is not the time to get on your soap box, I reminded myself.  She’s entitled to her feelings.  Just let it go. While I maintained an even facial expression, the woman’s words infuriated me.  She openly admitted that she didn’t know anything about the situation and yet she assumed the divorce was a tragedy simply because the couple had […]

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I’m Not Bitter. I’m on a Mission.

Last month, this happened… “I don’t understand why people do it,” a man told me.  “I’ve been married for more than thirty years, and even during the worst of times I never considered divorce.” “That’s great,” I congratulated him. “We had some bad times,” he assured me.  “But I never wanted to live without her.” “And that’s the difference,” I explained.  “There were times when I would rather have died than continue to live in my marriage.” As his mind opened, his face changed from a countenance of confidence to one of humble sympathy.  If our conversation had been a […]

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Divorce and the Talking Dog

The December before my parents got divorced, they adopted a puppy.  Dekker was my Christmas present, and I couldn’t have been happier.  I wanted him to sleep in bed with me, but he was too small to go up the stairs.  My parents didn’t want him on the furniture, so I slept on the living room floor to be with him overnight. As his puppiness progressed, he went from being a tiny and quiet ball of fur to an active and destructive young lad.  In the Spring, he dug and chewed the linoleum floor in the kitchen. “We might not […]

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Guest Post: Familial Evolution

This guest post comes from David Williams, who is sharing this story on behalf of a family member who can offer a full picture of divorce through her parents’ divorce and her own…

Familial Evolution – Perspectives on Divorce from Child to Mother

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