For a Child of Divorce, This Sucks

I say it often:  I love divorce. This stance comes mostly from my positive personal experience both as a child of divorced parents and an ex-wife. I’ve listened to plenty of conflicting opinions, and I’ve heard lots of horror stories. Still, I love divorce because I know it can be a solution for families in crisis. It’s not often that I feel emotionally triggered around the topic. I frequently refer to my parents’ divorce and the benefits that came from it. I believe it was one of the best things to happen in my family. I think of myself as a well-adjusted adult who […]

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Let’s Talk About Gray Divorce

While “Gray Divorce” (Baby Boomer Divorces) has been a hot topic for a few years now, I haven’t written about it. There are a few reasons for this: 1… I divorced in my twenties, so I’m not personally familiar with the phenomenon. 2… My parents divorced in their thirties, so I can’t comment as a child of such divorces. 3… Personal preference:  I’ve never liked the branding. For as awesome as I think Divorce is, I don’t want to treat it like a trend.  But, despite my ignorance-and-arrogance-induced silence, Gray Divorce isn’t going away.  It’s time for me to embrace it (and appreciate […]

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Nonviolent Communication

My latest educational obsession is Nonviolent Communication (NVC). Since last November, I’ve attended several workshops, read a few books and joined a local practice group. I believe NVC can save the world. Marshall Rosenberg, PhD literally wrote the book about NVC. It’s called Nonviolent Communication, and the third edition is the one most recently made available. In the book, Rosenberg points out the ways humans typically (and non-effectively) communicate:  often we don’t accurately separate our thoughts and feelings… we aren’t in touch with our needs… we make a lot of judgements and comparisons… we deny responsibility… According to Rosenberg, we […]

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What if We Did Divorce Like We Do Marriage?

Previously, I asked the question, “What if we did marriage the way we do divorce?” The situation was somewhat silly, as the post was meant to inspire consideration. My true intention was to introduce a new question: What if we did divorce like we do marriage? Let’s start by reviewing a traditional wedding… when a couple plans their ceremony, they consult with various professionals. It’s likely they’ll visit multiple locations before deciding where to hold the event. They’ll spend some time at a bakery. They’ll price a few potential caterers and florists. Quite often, couples meet with a spiritual leader for […]

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Parental Alienation… an Interview With Dr. Jennifer J. Harman

Jennifer J. Harman, PhD, is an Associate Professor of Psychology at Colorado State University. I discovered Dr.  Harman when I watched her TEDx Talk about Parental Alienation. While watching, I was intrigued because, unlike many professionals, Dr. Harman didn’t focus solely on the diagnosis of parents and children. She talked broadly about the societal stereotypes and how our attitudes about mothers and fathers allow alienation to take hold. I was fascinated and wanted to know more. A few weeks ago, I had the honor of interviewing Dr. Harman. She told me that Parental Alienation isn’t just a Family Issue, it’s a […]

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