Conflict Is A Canyon

You don’t have to be divorced to know conflict.  We have conflicts with people in all areas of our lives:  our parents, children, coworkers, cashiers, neighbors, friends, friends-of-friends, random people on Facebook… this list goes on… There are different ways to deal with conflict.  Some conflicts can be avoided.  Sometimes people dig their heels in and compete.  Sometimes they back down and accommodate.  Some conflicts are solved via simple compromise (although that usually isn’t ideal). Most of the time, true peace and healing (for both sides) comes from collaboration.  That is, when both sides are willing to sit down and dive […]

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Make Divorce Healthier

Making Divorce Healthier

Change is coming. Can you feel it? It’s been happening for a few years, now. While I’ve been out there typing my message and talking to anyone who will listen, others have also been hard at work. We now have more coaches. We have more mediators. Sometimes mediation is required before a couple can see a judge. Collaborative Divorce is a thing- an option gaining in popularity (in some areas more than others). More parents see the value in “conscious uncoupling.” And…slowly but surely, we’re seeing events devoted to the topic of divorce and separation. The one I’m most excited […]

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Interview with Christina Vinters, J.D., Family Law Mediator

Earlier in the summer, I was delighted to learn about a new book about divorce. The book was called Pathways to Amicable Divorce, and it was written by Family Law Mediator, Christina Vinters. At the time, the book was being offered for free as part of a launch promotion, so I quickly clicked and added it to my digital library. As you probably know, I’m highly passionate about productive, mindful, respectful (amicable) divorce processes. I’ve read a lot of books about divorce, and they can be a bit clinical (really boring), especially the how-to guides. But Pathways to Amicable Divorce was […]

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Divorce Corp Family Law Reform Conference

You might recall how excited I was back in January when the movie Divorce Corp came to a theater near me (I wrote about it here).  This past weekend I was even more delighted to attend the Divorce Corp Family Law Reform Conference in Alexandria, VA. The event was attended by a wide variety of people:  lawyers, therapists, coaches, consultants, moms, dads, friends…  each one with a personal story and a deep desire to see some serious changes in the family court system.  The speakers were passionate, knowledgeable professionals with captivating stories, facts and missions to share.  I laughed.  I […]

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Divorce Mediation Training… Check!

I completed my Divorce Mediation Training last week.  I’m now qualified to empower couples toward productive conversation about the terms of their divorce.  Yay! The experience was interesting.  It was quite unlike Basic Mediation Training, which left me feeling warm and fuzzy inside.  My Basic Mediation class was full of social workers, therapists and managers who were looking for  new ways to approach conflict.  In Family Mediation Training, I was the only participant who was not an attorney.  I started out feeling rather uncomfortable, to say the least. On Day One, a woman asked our instructor, “What business does a […]

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