Shame and Blame and Fear (of Divorce)… Oh My!

A couple weeks ago, I wrote an article about the moments I knew my marriage was over.  It was originally published on and was later featured by The Huffington Post.  You can read it here. The piece wasn’t the first of mine that’s been picked up by The Huffington Post, but  judging by the response, I think it was the most popular (and perhaps that’s why it was published on the German site as well).  Not only did I receive some ‘thank you’ emails from those who walked a similar path, the article garnered more than 200 comments.  Unlike […]

Continue reading

Taking Responsibility

“Accept responsibility, and power will be given to you. Taller trees grow from lower ground” – Tao Te Ching

A few days ago, Boyfriend and I got into a discussion about divorce and blame. We discussed the common tactic of assigning fault to explain a divorce: “she was a bitch” and “he was an asshole”. That makes it so easy, doesn’t it? And in the complicated world of divorce, we relish the easy explanation- especially if it absolves us of guilt.

It was Gandhi who suggested “you must be the change you wish to see in the world”, and I believe that’s true. In an effort to “be the change”, I’ve decided to publicly take responsibility for my own role in the meltdown of my marriage.

Continue reading