Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt …?

I’ve heard this Love Quote said both ways:   I think they’re both dumb. (That sounds harsh, I know) Of course, I enjoy the pretty pictures and the fantasy sentiment. And I like the often-accompanying messages about dancing like nobody’s watching and singing like you don’t need the money. I get it. It’s all about living from the heart and in the moment. But, the thing about being hurt… well, I think the existence of past and future hurts can enhance a partnership, not detract from it. To quote Glennon Doyle Melton: “Grief is love’s souvenir. It’s our proof that we […]

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Meant to Be

What’s Meant To Be…

Was it Meant To Be? The night before I began my senior year of high school, my redheaded boyfriend and I broke up. I was heartbroken (funny how these things look so much different after a couple decades). About a week later, I received a wisdom-filled letter from my great aunt. “If it’s meant to be, it will,” she wrote. “And if it’s not, nothing will make it work.” She also suggested I take time to lick my wounds and focus on One Day At A Time while my heart healed. I found comfort in her words. Eventually I ran out of […]

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What Does an Election Have in Common With Divorce?

In the shower one morning, as I was rinsing my hair, I mentally stepped back to notice the chatter going on inside my head.  To my dismay, I realized I was deeply entangled in an imaginary argument with some family members.  About politics.  And what’s worse is that my imaginary argument was the continuation of a real discussion that took place two weeks prior. Two.  Weeks.  Prior. What’s wrong with me? A billion things have happened since then. I highly doubt anyone involved in that discussion is still thinking about it now.  Why am I?  Why aren’t I focusing on […]

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Your Heart… Is Something.

I was 544 words into another blog post when I stumbled across this plan-altering video.  To summarize:  in less than 3 minutes, a little girl explains to her mother why her parents should be friends. She doesn’t simply say, “Don’t fight.”  She puts forth the most heartfelt logic to back up her request: “My heart… is something.  Everyone else’s heart is something too.” Her words touched my heart.  Although this child was requesting that her parents lower the height of their conflict, her reasoning extends far beyond domestic disagreements. After watching the video, I thought about my neighbors.  I thought […]

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Communication Breakdown (in the woods and in the world)

The following tale of communication breakdown isn’t about divorce.  Except, it is.  It’s also about all other relationships… Once upon a time, I went hiking with a group and became separated from one of my companions.  When he didn’t meet the rest of us at the end of the trail, I backtracked, searching for him.  I called his name.  He didn’t answer.  I walked faster.  I searched harder.  I called louder.  No response.  I was on the verge of panic when I heard him yell my name.  “TARA?!”  I darted in the direction of his voice.  As I rounded a curve […]

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