How To Deal With Your Ex’s New Partner In Public

You might hate your ex’s new partner.  Lots of people do.  S/he might have been the affair partner that you blame for the demise of your marriage.  You might think this new person is too young, too old, too smart, or not smart enough. You might occasionally encounter your ex’s new partner in a public setting.  And it doesn’t feel good.  It might be an unexpected encounter at the grocery store.  Maybe you work at the same place.  Or this new person might be in attendance at your child’s events. The thought of this fills you with dread.  And the actual occurrence […]

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Love Who You Want (Unless It’s The Ex?)

My Facebook Feed turned red this week, and for good reason. I was happy to see so many of my friends show support for marriage equality by changing their avatars to various renditions of the HRC logo. Among the textual blurbs: “love is never wrong”,” anger leads to hate, hate leads to The Dark Side” and my personal favorite, “dogs don’t discriminate, neither should humans.” These are all wonderful messages, and it fills me with joy to see so much support of equal rights for all who want to get married (and, if necessary, divorced).

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Do People Change?

Many years ago, I dated someone whom I’ll call “Don”. He drove a sporty coupe and worked at a grocery store. Back then, I wore short shorts and had a somewhat catty relationship with his ex-girlfriend. We ate at cheap restaurants, spent many evenings at the movies and engaged in a lot of “experimental” activity. We were young and in love and… you get the idea.

Nowadays Don is married with a bunch of kids. He’s a medical professional and owns a vehicle with four doors. I’m sure it’s been a really long time since he vomited tequila and macaroni and cheese on someone’s bedroom floor. Blue eyes aside, he barely resembles the guy who affectionately referred to me as “Boo Boo”.

Did he change?

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Badmouthing Your Ex

Why You Should Stop Badmouthing Your Ex

A favorite pastime for those enduring divorce is to sit around with our besties and Trash The Ex. The ex-related expletives bring a sense of purpose or confidence. Perhaps the practice offers a sense of release so that one can proceed with a clearer head. Either way, it feels good to vent among those who are closest and offer support.

I get it. And I’ve done it. But I don’t condone it. At least, not to excess.

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