Thanksgiving And Divorce

From the time I was very young, my closest extended family members were a minimum two-hour drive away.  With the exception of vacations, I saw them only on holidays and special occasions. Before my parents divorced, we had a routine for this time of year:  Thanksgiving was always spent with my dad’s family, and we alternated Christmases between my mom’s and dad’s families. After the divorce, I assumed my holiday schedule would remain the same, and it did.  For me, keeping the same routine was important for two reasons: In the beginning, there was a comfort in keeping the same […]

Continue reading

What Does an Election Have in Common With Divorce?

In the shower one morning, as I was rinsing my hair, I mentally stepped back to notice the chatter going on inside my head.  To my dismay, I realized I was deeply entangled in an imaginary argument with some family members.  About politics.  And what’s worse is that my imaginary argument was the continuation of a real discussion that took place two weeks prior. Two.  Weeks.  Prior. What’s wrong with me? A billion things have happened since then. I highly doubt anyone involved in that discussion is still thinking about it now.  Why am I?  Why aren’t I focusing on […]

Continue reading

Communication Breakdown (in the woods and in the world)

The following tale of communication breakdown isn’t about divorce.  Except, it is.  It’s also about all other relationships… Once upon a time, I went hiking with a group and became separated from one of my companions.  When he didn’t meet the rest of us at the end of the trail, I backtracked, searching for him.  I called his name.  He didn’t answer.  I walked faster.  I searched harder.  I called louder.  No response.  I was on the verge of panic when I heard him yell my name.  “TARA?!”  I darted in the direction of his voice.  As I rounded a curve […]

Continue reading
til death do us part

Rethinking “‘Til Death Do Us Part”

For the most part, people don’t get married with the intention of getting divorced.  Everyone knows the odds intends to beat them.  Every couple thinks their union is strong enough to last “’til death do us part.”  What if I told you that everyone is right?  Everyone succeeds. A few weeks ago, I met a young man on a mountain top.  As we chatted, he told me a little about his spiritual journey. He was an atheist until the day he sensed the presence of God while observing animals at play.  From that point on, things changed for him, and now […]

Continue reading

Let’s Talk About Failed Marriages

If you listen, you’ll hear a lot of talk about failed marriages.  But what’s the real topic in such discussions?  The answer is divorce. Divorce is indicative of a failed marriage (at least for those who choose to use such terminology), but the truth is the marriage failed long before a divorce was set in motion.  Yet nobody talks about those failures because the marriage is still “intact.” Marriage ceremonies feature sacred vows which are supposed to bind two people to each other for as long as they both shall live.  In most cases, some version of “til death do […]

Continue reading