Do People Change?

Many years ago, I dated someone whom I’ll call “Don”. He drove a sporty coupe and worked at a grocery store. Back then, I wore short shorts and had a somewhat catty relationship with his ex-girlfriend. We ate at cheap restaurants, spent many evenings at the movies and engaged in a lot of “experimental” activity. We were young and in love and… you get the idea.

Nowadays Don is married with a bunch of kids. He’s a medical professional and owns a vehicle with four doors. I’m sure it’s been a really long time since he vomited tequila and macaroni and cheese on someone’s bedroom floor. Blue eyes aside, he barely resembles the guy who affectionately referred to me as “Boo Boo”.

Did he change?

Continue reading

Cries For Help: The Dance We Do…

A baby cries for attention because he has a need that he can neither understand nor communicate. “Wah… Wahhh…WAAHHH!!!” Immediately, others come running with remedies: bottles, toys, bouncy seats, rocking chairs… “There, there, Infant,” they tell him. “You are safe.  You are loved.” The baby will then gulp their milk, inspect their toys and delight in the attention that’s paid him… Until he feels satisfied, and again goes to sleep. As humans, we are programmed to make a fuss when something is wrong.  As we grow from infancy we become more verbal, however many times we remain unable to articulate […]

Continue reading

Off-Duty Parenting… Babysitting?

The worst thing about my parents’ divorce was how much they cooperated. That sounds odd, doesn’t it? As a child, their level of respect for each other made the transitions easy for me and my sister. But as an adult, I’ve had a hard time understanding the animosity that plays out between separating couples.

One area where my parents worked together was the subject of caring for the kids if the custodial parent couldn’t. We lived with my mom most of the time and if she had somewhere to go or something to do, my dad was always quick to step in. I grew up thinking that was the way it should be.

Continue reading