No, I’m not getting married. I’ve agreed to preside over a self-uniting ceremony for a friend and her fiance. Not a bad gig for a Divorce Encouragist, huh? I met Ellen several years ago, when we were both legally married. Since then, we’ve each signed “I don’t anymore,” reclaimed our birth names, and moved on (and up) in a variety of ways. When Ellen met Andrew, circumstances were quite forbidding in terms of a serious relationship. Yet, amazingly, the stars aligned for them. After more than a year of domestic bliss, he popped the question, and she agreed to become […]Continue reading
One Saturday morning in a yoga class, I rose into a crescent lunge and prepared to bend back, possibly far enough to peek at the wall behind me. “Sink into your hips, and build the pose,” my teacher instructed. She explained how important it is to ground down in order to feel the energy rise up. She stressed strength in the core as she told us to grow taller on the inhale and open our hearts as we exhaled. (in yoga, as in life, “Inhale: grow taller. Exhale: go deeper.) “Don’t just jack your back,” she cautioned. “You’ll hurt yourself.” […]Continue reading
Once upon a time, there lived a couple named Jack and Janice. Jack and Janice were both well-educated individuals with high-paying jobs. They lived in a beautiful home they built themselves, nestled in the woods and surrounded by hiking trails they’d cut with their own tools.
After eight years of marriage, Jack made friends with a younger woman at the gym.Continue reading
During a recent interview on Family Matters radio show, Jill Egizii asked me what advice I’d give to people looking to have a successful marriage. I gave the typical response: it takes work (the relationship has to be on the Priority List) and it takes planning (what are the expectations?). And I told a story about a conversation I had last Saturday…Continue reading
I’ll tell you more about Gina soon. For now, I’d like to focus on her problem. I only recall a handful of times when I was awakened in the night by my parents’ arguments, but that was enough. I remember the irritation, the stress (sometimes it lasted for days afterward), the curiosity… I remember being wide awake after the fight was over and feeling like I’d never get back to sleep. There were times when I wanted to get up and make a trip to the bathroom or to the kitchen for a drink, yet I was afraid to move from my bed because I didn’t want my mom and dad to know I hadn’t slept through their turmoil.Continue reading