The easiest way for me to consume books is to listen to them while I’m driving my car. That’s how I absorbed the content of Stacy Morrison’s Falling Apart In One Piece: One Optimist’s Journey Through The Hell of Divorce. It made my daily commute a lot more enjoyable. And…at times… awful.
I discovered Stacy Morrison at the Start Over Smart Divorce Expo earlier this year. After hearing her speak, I vowed to read her book. I read a lot of nonfictional-self-help-type divorce books. This one was autobiographical as it was Stacy’s recollection of the process she went through after her husband came home from work one day and told her he was “done”.
On one hand, audiobooks kinda suck because I can’t page through the piece, highlight my favorite parts and quote them here. On the other hand, it was somewhat of a treat to listen to Stacy tell me her story in her own words. As she recounted the dramatic events, I identified with her initial bewilderment coupled with her strong work ethic and drive to perform regardless of what was happening at home. As a mother, Stacy shared her joys as well as her hardships while navigating divorce with a young child. She talked about the struggle to reconstruct her social life, the difficulties of vacationing as a single parent and the nights she spent crying on the kitchen floor. It was all very raw and real— no sugar-coating.
What I appreciated most was Stacy’s attitude. Even though her world was crumbling around her, she stayed strong and true to herself and her family. She stated early on that she didn’t want to be the one who was right, nor did she want to be the one who was wronged (love, love, love that statement!). What she wanted was peace and understanding. She realized that she needed to create her own story- that she and her ex had to blaze a unique path through their separation instead of getting caught in the currents of animosity born from the jagged pasts and filtered frights of so many peers.
Of course, the journey to peace and understanding is never an easy one. As Stacy shares the highlights of her divorce, she imparts the bits of wisdom she learned along the way— little lessons such as “You Don’t Get To Know Why, But Ask Anyway”, “Grief Is Not a Mountain, It Is a River” and my personal favorite, “Anger Hides Everything You Need To Feel To Get Past The Anger” (that mouthful so simply says it all).
Through the initial shock… the uncertainties… telling the family… picking up the pieces… the leaning… the crying… the angry outbursts… the journey is unique, yet the territory is not. The story is familiar but not boring. And the lessons hold true regardless of the path that led to their discovery.
I’m glad I found the time to observe Stacy’s process of Falling Apart In One Piece. Did you read it? Did you like it? I’m open to discussion @relativevolutions, firstname.lastname@example.org or my Facebook Page.